The Curse of Ice Cream and Pizza

My chef and I have a theory. Keep in mind I wouldn't be posting this if it hadn't proven itself time and time again in the state that we live in.  When you see a restaurant add pizza (especially pizza delivery) and ice cream to their menu, beware they will fold in 6 months. Yes, there are restaurants that do specifically sell pizza and have right from the beginning, the same goes for ice cream. However, if it's a fine dining restaurant that has added both in the same week along with a wooden ice cream cone outside, that is not a good sign.

This looks like they are trying to make money, and fast!  How can a failing restaurant try to increase revenue without putting a very loud (we're desparate) ice cream sign outside their swanky establishment?  I think this is where the think outside of the box mentality comes into play. If there are certain items on your menu that sell well, then offer them for purchase in heat up at home pans.  I've seen a few sandwich shops do this and they do it well. Chances are if you're failing at that point, then you have staff standing around who can definitely be making these items. Compile these (dinner at home) meals on a sort of take out menu that is given to a customer at the end of their meal with their change. Yes servers out there... don't ask if they want change, JUST DO IT!!! A customer will be much more flattered if you don't bat an eye and just give people their change. Let them figure out the tip, they are the customer after all.

You say, but them I'm scaring people away from coming back. Well look buddy... at this point they're not enough people are coming in anyway. If they have the option of taking their favorites home to heat up on a busy night, good for you and for them. In a tourism focused state, what a great idea for people to order these meals from your restaurant, take them home and heat them up for their condo of 12 friends that they have come to ski with.

This outside of the box mentality will truly help you and prevent you from the screaming ice cream sign (We're desparate!!).

So You Want to Sell Your What?!

Chef has been baking biscotti since December. I call him the non-baker baker. Through trial and error he has taught himself how to bake. Using a family recipe, he has perfected a very forgiving recipe. Flavor experiments have come home some, maple walnut have been a huge hit. However other flavors, like watermelon weren't so good.
Our boys who are now 4 and 7 love when daddy bakes biscotti at work because it means they get the "butts" of the biscotti loaves.  My husband has decided that he wants to start selling his biscotti as a means to save money for a deposit for his first restaurant.  Pretty ingenious I think.  Being a librarian I tend to help with the research part of it. Librarian's are resourceful with research, borderline OCD/stalkers.  If we can't find what we needs we think of a millions ways around it to get our answer.
Last night was the initial "Oh Boy, this is really going to become a reality." My thought was "You'd better find a way to sell the butts or I am going to gain a lot of unwanted weight!!!" It's carb heaven or hell whichever way you choose to look at it.  The problem is his biscotti is damn good!!! I favor the dunk it in your coffee and eat it approach.
What is in a name? Unfortunately, chef wanted to involved the children's names. OK well that gives us Sebriel, Gebastian. Let's try intials well it'll either be SCS (sucks) or GSS (gas). Let's think of nicknames we use, Little E, E, Chef, Narcisus, Ego.... maybe not.  In the end we did actually come up with a name based on another one of my husband's nicknames and a way to involve the kids in designing a logo. Hopefully the logo will be more appropriate than the picture that was sent home from school with a lady (anatomically correct) with a baby at her feet. Keep in mind we have two women in our family who are pregnant and I had just come home from a baby shower. (Try explaining that to a teacher!)
Next premises okay well we're mulling that one over and looking at our options. Not too thrilled about chef's suggestion that our kitchen needs to be cleaner if that's the direction we go in. Cleaner?! Maybe if he stopped collecting kitchen parephenalia I'd be able to put it all away! I did glance nearby to see how nearby the cast iron pan was to my hand.
Here's to entering unchartered water!!

Will You Please Just Eat And Enjoy This Date!!!!!

     If you are married or attached to a chef then you definitely can relate to this entry.  Eric and I love going out to dinner. With that said, we can NEVER go out to eat without him picking apart the competition. It's not that he's negative about where we've chosen to go it's that he likes to see what other colleagues do right and wrong. Sometimes he can get a great idea from something he's eaten. Chances are they will compare the menu to their menu at work, laugh or make fun of descriptions, "dripping?!?! What do you mean dripping?! Like bacon fat?"
     Our anniversary was last week and we went out to eat.  When eating out with your chef you need to make sure you have their full attention about every five minutes. First, check the silverware and glasses. They will immediately pick up on whether they are not clean or polished. Make sure you ask a non yes or no question.  Something that makes them think. If you've truly lost them because they are too busy trying to figure out what the table next to you is eating, then say something like "You're shirt is on fire." or "I think Gordon Ramsay would eat you alive." The reaction will definitely tell you what he has or has not heard. 
     Sometimes chefs can be rather selfish with their meal selections. Note: Many times they will only give you a taste of their meal because they don't like it or there is an ingredient that they haven't decoded yet and they need someone else's palate for analysis.  They especially will not share dessert good luck if you try to take a bite and don't get your hand slapped with a spoon. 
      You need to figure out if you would rather them hate their meal, because if they do like it then they see this place as competition. Now is when they will ask you, "How does it compare to my food?", "Do you taste the fennel in that?". They actually become excited and jealous that there is competition.
    The only exception to the above statements is if you go to a fair. Then count on them ordering the biggest messiest item they can find and love it! For example yesterday we were at a beach boardwalk and my chef ordered an italian sausage loaded with onions and peppers. You are most likely better off having dinner at home, at a boardwalk, or hotdog stand.
    

How to Support your Chef

     So what do you do when your chef leaves a restaraunt for a new one or faces challenges that is pushing limits that they've never met before?  Support, you've got to be their support.  My chef started working at a new resort Christmas Day and has been loving it. There's nothing like seeing your chef cooking the type of food that they love! Chefs always complain about wanting to work a "normal" 9-5 job.  Most can't do that and I'll explain why.  They're adrenaline junkies. They love the pressure for some reason they thrive on fast paced, instense situations.  If or when they do get that 9-5 job, they don't like it. It's too easy, boring  blah blah blah. I'd rather have my husband complain about being slammed and the ticket printer almost overheating from too many orders than complaining about not having anything to do.
      This leads to where we are at now. My hubs will be managing a restaraunt that has its challenges. He's really excited about this challenge I might add.  In our house we have this rule, if you're stressed you can have your little freak out but, you then have to pick yourself up and say okay what needs to be done and let's make a plan of attack. This started when my husband was a server. Servers almost always are sat more tables than they can handle, especially good servers.  Nothing ticks me off more than seeing one server have to take care of a ten table dining room by themselves.  I just want to look at the management and say either help them out or give them more money because you just screwed your server out of tips.  The more tables you get the worse the service becomes for the other tables. This in turn causes longer waits for food, blah blah, blah and you have an avalanche on your hands. When hubs would be sat too many tables there was always a point that he would get overwhelmed and couldn't give perfect service.
     What do you do? STOP EVERYTHING THAT YOU ARE DOING!!! BREATHE! Now ask yourself what needs to be done? 1 needs Drinks, Food is up for 2 and 4, 3 needs ketchup, 5 hasn't ordered yet. Sometimes this list can reach up to 10 if you have that many tables.  After you figure out what needs to be done figure out what's the most efficient way I can do this. It may involve asking someone to help you. THAT's OKAY!!!!! If management is picking their nails and tells you no, they don't deserve their salary!!! Point blank I'm putting it out there. You respect the managers that help or wouldn't ask you to do something you wouldn't do yourself. Yes I know, this post is sounding a little soap boxish.  Once you have figured out how you're going to get it done, do it!  Flip outs and tears do nothing for you. They suck all of the energy that you could be using to say to yourself, what, how and then do.
      This is a wonderful way to handle a lot of stressful situations.  A friend recently told me, I don't know how true it is, that some psychologists are taking a tough love approach. There is something to be said for that. You always have to keep yourself moving forward.
      Going back to the original paragraph hubs and I are taking this approach to his new venture. You had your flip now what needs to be done. After almost ten years of marraige this has worked the best for him.  Lists are involved, lots of lists. Organizing, Prioritizing and Planning. Break it down for them if they can't see beyond the immediate situation. You are their voice of reason. That's what is absolutely wonderful about being someone who doesn't work with them or in a restaraunt. This is when you are at your best!

County Fair Adventures

     So this past weekend was our favorite fair. It's chock full of fun. We paced ourselves and even had a little break and let the boys go nuts in all of the leaves that had scattered the park. It has everything, livestock barns, crafts, 4H competitions performers, tractor pulls, fair rides and sooo much more. Eric got to go for the first time in three years. This is a big time tradition in our family. The one thing that attracts us more than anything is fair food. Moderation is okay right? Once a year to me is moderation to enjoy all of it's greasy goodness.
      We could not make a decision on what we wanted. Soup in a bread bowl, Buffalo Burger, BBQ brisket, Burgers, hot dogs, fried everything, chili, bbq chicken, really huge turkey drumsticks.  It came down to Italian sausage sub for Eric and a buffalo burger for me, hot dog for Gabe and cheeseburger for Sebastian.  We passed the giant eclairs and our decisions were mostly because we didn't want to be too full for later. 
     We stayed till the very end of the day for the dessert auction. Now this is one thing we have never been to.  Everyone who is interested gathers around the vegetable competition barn and out of the small door at the end the auctioneer walks outside with a microphone.  All money collected is donated to the local food pantry so it all goes to a good cause. All entries and winners are auctioned off.  There are bread, pies, cookies, cakes, tarts, homemade granola it is truly amazing. There are junior and adult cake decorating competitions the entries looked like something from a cake competition you would see on Food Network.
     At this point in the day the boys had had it, they were exhausted! Eric was salivating and I was just curious. The first thing we bid on and won were homemade donuts. These were gone two days later. You really get into the fun of bidding, even if you don't win you start to develop a strategy. Bid for a dollar less than you think your limit is. Simply put the auctioneer always gets you before you say Uh oh I didn't mean to bid. Too late and he knows it!  The boys started coming out of their fair coma when they saw orange cakes that looked like Halloween graveyards and a one that had a fondant fisherman sitting on a bridge fishing in a pond.  We then won a homemade multi-grain bread that looked incredible. Since the auction I'm the only won who's been eating it.
     Then came the cookies. well Eric is REALLY into peanut butter. I can't ever buy a small jar because it'll be gone in one sitting with a spoon.  Out comes peanut butter and jelly picnic cookies. The cookie itself looks like a slice of bread but the peanut butter and jelly are baked in between the "slices". Eric salivated so badly his hand went up before the bidding even started. By this time we had begun a box of goodies the donuts, bread and now the cookies. I was enjoying myself having fun till all of a sudden the love of my life was placed on the auction block. A rather large Swiss chocolate cream pie with homemade whipped cream and chocolate shaving. My heart palpitated and I was a goner.  Needless to say I won this pie and my empty plate is sitting right next to me as I type this. Eric told me on the way home, that my eyes had bugged out my jaw hit the floor and he knew it was over from there. There was no way I was going home without that pie!
     The pie was a blue ribbon winner at the fair and in my stomach!!

We're out of dessert! Do something!

     One of the best times working at the entertainment venue was arranging the dessert table. When I see a doily it makes me think of chocolate. I absolutely loved taking the cakes out of their pastry boxes and cutting them in slivers small enough to feed a large army. After each slice I would drag the knife sideways down the edge of a clean square plate so that no crumbs would damage the perfect top of the cake when I cut the next piece. When I was finished arranging the table, I would find my carefully hidden square plate and with my index finger wipe the chocolate icing off and taste the delectable burst of ganache. This was a treat that I never told the other chefs about. Why do you ask? Because they are vultures and would have swooped in and stolen my plate if they knew.  Since as a cook in a equatorial temperature kitchen you sweat profusely and eat little the taste of chocolate in my mouth was pure bliss. It ended with a very triumphant hand wash and a cat that ate the canary grin on my face.
     The table always looked fantastic just before service like something you'd see in a display case. On some nights it was my duty to keep this table stocked with goodies, plates and forks. Sometimes I just had to tidy it's appearance. People LOVE their dessert and if you need any proof man the dessert table!  One such night I was doing this very thing.  I was running food for the buffet and keeping an eye on the dessert table.  We started getting low on desserts when I told the head chef we were almost out. A frantic frenzy started in the kitchen as I was told to look in the freezer.  Who cares about the meal give the people their sugar!!!!
     This was a chance for me to think out of the box. Okay..... think back to mom, meme, aunties and the things they used to bring to family gatherings. With stealth that would make MacGyver blush I gather plastic wrap, floss and ranch dressing. In all seriousness I gathered whipped cream bags, angel food cake, frozen strawberries and a can of chocolate fudge. Through the innovative use of a microwave for defrosting and crumbling cake I did the impossible.  In less time than it takes for a cook to have a butt break I created a trifle to the shock and amazement of the kitchen.  I even had enough left to create a very quick plates of strawberry short cake. 
     At the end of the night I took a couple of victory laps around the kitchen as I brought in the last remnants of the trifle.  The only thing that tends to happen when you have such a wonderful moment is that somewhere out of nowhere the thing you were looking for the most materializes out of thin air because the kitchen gnomes bring it out of hiding. There in the chefs hands from the walk-in came a triple dutch chocolate cake. The only thing I could do in regards to the hairy eyeball was say, "Well that's great we can use it tomorrow night!"  That's why if you tell your chef you are out of something they tell you to "Look Again".

You might be attached to a chef if...

You might be attached to a chef if...

... there are more pictures of food on your computer than your children

...chef coats and pants is the first thing you look for when birthday shopping and Christmas shopping

...instead of giving your chef a glass of water at home you hand them a pitcher

...the plates you use at home came from a restaurant (they were given to us when T.G.I.Fridays changed their plate design)

...You have a framed print hanging in your house of peppers, chef, cafes or tomatoes

...when you buy a car you have to consider if a cambro can fit in the trunk

...you find substitutions for everything (out of sugar for your coffee? Use the red sugar that you decorate cookies with. What's wrong with pink coffee?!?!?!)

...you can't cook in the kitchen together because you 120lb chef needs a 6 foot radius of space to work in.

...you've eaten things that would never enter your vocabulary escargot, chicken livers?!

...you know when your chef wants you to taste something, it's probably hot enough to burn your lips off.

...you know the food trends of this coming season simply because you are your chef's research assistant
  (locally grown, gluten free, grass fed, foraged herbs and mushrooms, sustainable)

...you have more cookbooks in your home than your favorite online retailer.

...your chef has made you record every cookbook that is borrowed from your home.

...you have your own chef coat/pants/clogs/apron and hat

...you use monogrammed knives in your kitchen

...there are food magazines in your bathroom for reading material

...you place bets on who will win competitive chef shows and you are usually the winner (it's a rerun and you've seen it 5 times)