You might be the wife of a chef if...
...you tell your children if they don't behave you will 86 dessert
...you know your chef's kitchen staff by name and reputation but not by face
...your close group of friends include a baker, chef, kitchen manager, restaurant owner, bartender, server, dishwasher, food purveyor, florist, dj, musician, caterer, limo driver, sommelier, justice of the piece, event coordinator and travel agent
...when talking to friends who want to book an event you whip out your cell phone and scroll through your 200 contacts
...a date with your chef includes them disappearing into the kitchen for the tour while you are left in the dining room smiling at the other guests.
...when you go out to eat you act like you are a food critic (you also have a small notebook in your purse because you secretly wish someone would ask you to be a food critic)
...your children know what Duck Con Fit is even if they pronounce it Duck Cone Feet
...you know your chef will take at least 3 more hours for them to come home when they say "We're just cleaning up now"
...you give your chef's food purveyor the shopping list for your Christmas Even Buffet. Who wants to stand in those long lines at the grocery store anyway!
...you have ever had to load 100lbs of linens in your small car, with your children in their car seats, to deliver them to your chef who is having an event in a half hour
...your children have stuffed animals, hats and t-shirts from every restaurant, boat or hotel within a 100 mile radius of your house (your children are also on a first name basis with each of the owners)
...you order out the only night your chef is home
...you have to question the traditional resume format because your chef can't hand the potential employer a 20 page packet
...you can succesfully work in your own chef's kitchen from dishwasher to prep cook
...you read as many biographies of other chefs that you can to better understand your own chef (My personal choice was Gordon Ramsay's autobiography)
...you know why specials are really made at a restaurant and think twice before ordering them